I used to throw these fits when I was a kid when someone would tell me "No". Huge ass tantrums that would always end with someone getting bit, namely me. Yes I probably could have benefitted from a healthy dose of some nonspecific stimulant medication, but they (My parents, the ones who had us living in a volkswagen camper bus for a time) were somewhat Naturalists. That is excluding the nicotine and evening Scotch and Waters.
I held my family hostage at tantrumpoint, and rather than set some serious boundaries with my spoiled ass, they did the avoidance dance. Avoiding as best they could any situation in which I would need to be told no or restrained from doing what I damned well pleased.
The mind reels.
It was my use of food, my primary "Drug of Choice" that enabled me to self medicate and somehow level out emotionally. So that by the time I was 17 yrs. old I weighed in at a whopping 350 lbs. ...but by god, no more tantrums! I had calmed right down into the abyss that was peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and Gilligan's Island reruns.
My years lived as a fat person are with me every day, as I now resemble a Shar Pei puppy. I am proud of who I am. They are my battle scars against a turbulant world I lived in fear of for so many years, now set free. Sometimes people will ask "How did you lose all that weight?" because they want to know the "Secret to my success" (Normies don't ask how) . I know when they ask, they don't get it, aren't ready to shed the skin of protection. Because there is no secret to weight loss, you just wake up one day and make a decision, wake up one day and are sick and tired of being a fat person, so you change everything about your life that is making you one. End of story.
I no longer choose to medicate my feelings with external crap. Food, Shoes, Relationships, Shoes, Sex, Shoes, Etc. Ok, if it still worked I'd probably still be doing it...a little. A lot. But it just doesn't work worth a damn anymore.
Except Starbucks, I think I could medicate with Starbucks fine, and not have a prob...now I'm remembering that first winter of STUPID student loans for a degree I never completed that I'll be paying back till I'm in a home, and the $400 I went through in a month drinking quad, grande, caramel, breve, latte's...
Nothing in Excess, to thine own self be true. Er, whatever.
Why does every CPS employee have a food adiction, all the while pointing their finger at parents screaming "Your an addict!"?
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