Every Few Years A Child Dies And The Federal Funds Poor In

I had really good parents. Hard to believe these days, but I did, and I always knew they loved me. I never went through the phase when you hate your parents, we always had very good communication and my brother and I were always given respect as human beings. We always knew we were precious to our parents equally. They never shamed us, never put us down or made us feel like we were a problem. It was good to have them as my mom and dad. My first big dose of shame came when DHS took my children. I know that sounds far fetched, but it's completely true. This blog is my first attempt to write about my experiences at the hands of some of the most shamed people I've ever met. I don't know why some people can bounce back from adversity better than others? I'm suprised by the degree to which these series of experiences have caused me to shut down. I have been through things comparatively speaking much more difficult, but I think the key is the shame. When you are picked apart by a group of people, who consistently undermind your intelligence on a daily basis for five years, who treat you as a predator, who take away every once of dignity you have, then hand back one of your children and tell you not to let them down ...well, I could keep going, but what I'm getting to is that I am ashamed. Ashamed not just that the state took my children, making up the lies as they went, but that I took it. That I caved and let them win out of fear. I am ashamed I allowed myself to make a deal with terrorists and there is nothing I can do about it except suck it up. Suck it up and go get the most beautiful child I've ever seen, the king Playdoh eating champ-Al.
Statistically, parents who have lost their children and had them returned after a period of time, will lose them again within two years. The time frame I'm sure varies greatly, but If my own feelings are any indicator, there comes a point after the relief of just having them back in your arms wears off, when you start to realize just what's been done and to what extent The Department of Human Services had power over your life. If drugs/alcohol was ever an issue, and with over 80% of these parents it was, I can imagine then would be as good a time as any to numb those feelings of outrage, hence subsequent removals and eventual termination of rights. I think having access to private citizens phone records is heinous, but this is the same govermnent that had the right to walk in to my living room with a court order signed by a Judge on hearsay from a mentally ill case worker playing god, and take Al from me. I am afraid still, that writing here about it could warrant a repeat of history and what could I do differently this time?
I understand the premise behind the child welfare system, but it has failed miserably. Ask any parent who has been involved with CPS and they will recite a litany of horrors in the name of "The childs best interest", yet funds continue to pour in and children in DHS custody continue to die. My fear is that Kelsey's Law will only put a gun in the hands of already unstable people.